Thursday, September 17, 2009

Pride --> Anxiety --> Discouragement --> Peace

I'm out of time. Today I have to head back to Arizona from SDSU to finish fundraising. It's something I knew was going to happen 3 weeks ago when I came to San Diego, but the stuff that's happened, the things I've seen, and the people I've spent time with make leaving infinitely harder than I ever thought it would be. Even if it is just temporarily.

I spent a lot of time yesterday frustrated for so may reasons. I was frustrated because I felt like I had let my team down by not being funded and leaving them short handed at a crucial time in the ministry. I was frustrated because I felt like in the little time I've been here I haven't been as effective as I wanted to be. I was frustrated because what little I had accomplished I felt like would be gone, lost in the shuffle of the weeks to come as I try and get back out to SDSU.

It just comes down to a lack of faith. Paul and Timothy once wrote to the Phillipians -

For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

God will take care of it. His work never fades away, and He never takes a break. I wasn't trusting in the gracious God that allows and guides the sunrise and sunset every day. I wasn't asking enough of the generous God who once held the sun in the sky for an entire extra day at the request of one of his servants. And I wasn't thanking my God who had brought me this far, though He owed me nothing good and certainly nothing as incredible as what He's shown me these last 3 weeks. While I was wondering what it was that I had done wrong, the truth is, I can't do anything right without His help. "Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stay awake in Vain" (~Ps 127).

So now I go back to AZ, relying on God to complete his work in these guys I've met, to complete his work with my funding, and thanking Him for allowing me to witness the things He has shown me so far....But it's still hard.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

In the Big Inning-

-Was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Though Him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In Him was life and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it.

"The Light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it". Such an incredibly sad verse. A verse I saw played out over and over this week on campus talking to students about God. They just don't understand it. They don't understand their need for it, they don't care about the purpose of it, they don't see the amazingness of it.

We talked to one student in particular this week who just had absolutely no interest in anything spiritual. He wasn't opposed to religion, he felt pretty good about science, he didn't really feel it was necessary to figure out exactly how those fit together, he just didn't care. That's something we've been dealing with alot this first week of school. Apathy. Even students who have a Christian background when asked who God is, or What sets Christians apart usually give a very vague, watered-down answer.

It's in no way hopeless however. God has definitely been listening to the prayers for SDSU as the school year starts up. Even though we met a lot of students (especially men) who didn't care and weren't interested in Bible Study, God did bring us a few guys who seem genuinely interested. In fact a big prayer during this start up is that we would be able to reach some freshman guys. Typically freshman are still living in the dorms, so they can be a huge opportunity for ministry. Those first two days every single guy I talked to, save one, was a freshman.

Please continue to pray that God would send us some guys, and that we would have wisdom in ministering to the few he has allowed us thus far.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

The Present

Have you ever just sat back and realized that all your life has really just led up to this moment? Actually you could probably say that about every point in your life and not be wrong, but still. I was thinking today as I sat out front of my new home-ish type place that this is it. I've arrived. All my life I've been working towards an ultimate, far in the future goal; just need to graduate college and get a job. Now I'm here. I actually panicked for a second with that realization, kind of an early life crisis. Just for a second though, then I was excited.

I can't imagine how bad that panic would have been had I not been a Christian. Had I not believed that there was eternal value in my new job and the things I was doing. How could I possibly get out of bed in the morning with the illusionary meaning goal like getting a career after college finished, and all that's left is a meaningless 50 years or so of gathering stuff and trying to find happiness that I, and no one else will remember 2 months after I die. I think what really brought this idea home for me was the parable of the rich man who stored up all his crops only to lose his life before enjoying the fruit of them (Luke 12:13-34). How amazing it is to be given the hope of eternal life, giving actions the opportunity to have eternal value. As a result making every day in the present, of eternal importance. Crazy.

Friday, August 7, 2009


16 days and some change. That’s how much time I have left before I should be reporting to the campus of San Diego State University to begin my time of witnessing the single greatest, most powerful, just, wise, sovereign, and loving God at work.

I know its 16 days because that’s what the countdown widget on my homepage tells me. I added that widget at the beginning of the summer, as a sort of motivational tool. Here’s a tip to future wannabe motivators; don’t use a countdown widget. You’ll just find yourself staring at it in unbelief that the countdown is going so fast and the numbers are getting so small. If this countdown followed the rules of Professor Slughorn’s hourglass from Harry Potter then it must’ve been privy to a conversation concerning proper amortization of an asset. The countdown was going Usain Bolt fast. (If you realized I just said the same thing twice you’re in that rare crossover area between nerds and jocks, congratulations.)

At first I started to panic that this time was slipping away so quickly. I have so much left to do; so much more fundraising that needs to be done, more time to spend with family and friends, more time studying so that I can be effective when I get to SDSU, more time. But you know, ever since the fall of man there has always been two sides to everything. With some help from the Psalms, specifically Psalm 32:8, I started to see the other side to that countdown. I started to get excited about how little time there was left until I was able to go and reach students, hear where they are, what’s going on with their lives and get into the Word with them. I’m excited to see God work on campus and the countdown can’t go fast enough.

On a practical level however I am running out of time and I’m still in need of funding. Currently I am at about 35% of my target with just over two weeks to go. So please pray for that and possibly pray about joining my ministry by giving (Just click here!). Also let me know if you have any questions or suggestions about what I’m doing just leave a comment. Otherwise my email is

Monday, May 25, 2009

Part 2: EDGE Corps

Let’s restart this thing off with a verse:

Habakkuk 1:5 “Look among the nations and watch— Be utterly astounded! For I will work a work in your days which you would not believe, though it were told you.”

Somehow in the last 4 months, God has moved my life to the point where the only thing that made sense was to join EDGE corps after college. In case you don’t know EDGE corps is a 1 or 2 year program created by the Navigators to train Christians after college and help them minister to students at a college campus. I say somehow, but God was very intentional about putting me in this position. Let me explain.

As recently as 4 months ago I had a pretty solid outline for my life. Finish college, find a job in the business world, start a family, start my own business, and then grow old....Or something, that part was still a little fuzzy. As my graduation date approached however I began to realize something, I realized that I’m not equipped to take God with me into the workplace and be effective. I needed some training. At the same time I saw an opportunity I would never have again; the opportunity to reach minister to college students as a peer. With that in mind and taking it before God, I decided that joining EDGE corps for a year (with the option for a 2nd year) was what I wanted to do. To learn how to reach out to people and get involved in their lives to help them grow in Christ or maybe share the Gospel with them.

That verse from Habakkuk I started with was shared during one of our first training sessions as EDGE members. The idea I took away from it is that Habakkuk cries out to God over the evil of his people; the disrepair of his world really, and wants God to show himself or at least spare Habakkuk the pain of seeing anymore of this misery. There are definitely times I have that feeling, where I forget that God can do a work in this world, in the people I know, and I just wish that the whole thing would just go away. After reading that verse thought it’s exciting to think that God has said “No, I want you at San Diego State University where I will remind you and your small mindedness what I can do”. I can’t wait. Please pray for this.